Tuesday, August 24, 2004


Hard at work

Big interview in process, and my girls just went to the US last night for 2 weeks. This entailed catching a 3:30 am train from Munich to Frankfurt, so I'm pretty woozy right now, and will be working online for the next few hours anyway--I have a chat session w/ Triplopia's new editor to attend, then I'm gonna crash.

However, want to throw some stuff on the sidebar, so I thought I'd take the same opportunity to post two things here. First, in the course of my online work, stumbled across Bob Holman's spoken word album,In With the Out Crowd in its entirety, online, in Mp3 format. Holman put this up himself, so it is entirely on the up and up. For anyone who doesn't know, Holman is one of the godfathers of Spoken Word, best known for his work at the Nuyorican Poet's Cafe in the late 80's-early 90's, though he has a wide body of work. Anyone interested in more info, leave me a comment and I'll shoot you some links...or, just wait until October 15th, and I'll send you somewhere where you can get lotsa good links on the man. Particularly recommended is Track 4, 'The Death of Poetry'.

Second, a bit off the beaten track, this one, and born of silliness, but it's growing on me...delivery is key to this one, and to get it right, I think, will take lots of discipline...

[mode=10 year old Steven Wright attempting to bluff his way through a science report]


Most people have heads.
Generally, they find these heads quite useful.
A lot of heads contain teeth,
generally in the mouth,
and, unless you happen to be in a painting
by Pablo Picasso,
the mouth is generally found just below the nose
and considerably above the toes.
Proportionally speaking, of course.
Things don't have to be arranged like this.
For example, if you were a snail,
your anus would be above your head.
This would probably mean that toilets would have to be re-designed
and hats would be a lot like underwear.
Some people would wear fancier underwear than others.
There would be hats like jockey shorts,
or like cotton panties,
and then there would be hats like lace panties, or speedos.
There would probably even be fetish hats,
and all of them would probably come down lower on our foreheads.
Come to think of it, except for their being lower on the forehead,
hats are already a lot like underwear.
As it stands, the mouth and the nose
are part of the face,
and all of the heads I've seen have faces,
and a lot of them have hair.
Some of them have more hair than others.
They all have the same amount of face, though.
A lot of the senses are located in the head,
and specifically in the face,
which is why people usually don't like it
when you stick something in their face.
They're usually not so bothered about it
if you stick something in their hair,
unless it's bubble gum.
Still, it's better if someone sticks gum in your hair
than if they stick it up your nose.
When people sleep, a lot of them
put their head on a pillow.
I dangle mine over the edge of the bed,
which sometimes causes me to have a bad pain in the neck
when I wake up in the morning.
Heads are actually quite heavy.
When you eat, you use your head.
In fact, you use your head
when you do anything,
because that's where your brain is,
and you can't do anything without a brain,
not even really easy things,
like complaining, or peeing.
If you were a snail,
you probably wouldn't want to do both of those things
at the same time.
I like my head.
People usually think about the things on a head
as belonging to the head,
and not the other way around.
For example, a head has ears,
but ears don't have a head.
The same is true of mouths, and hair.
But my head belongs to me,
not the other way around.
There are heads almost everywhere in the world.
Even on animals. Like snails.
So, if you don't like heads,
you're probably in for a rough life.
Heads come in many shapes.
Some are oval. Others are round.
Some look more like squares,
and there are even heads
that are the shape of a pear
after it's been run through a dishwasher
and then pinched really hard in a vice.
Some people like certain shapes of heads
better than they do others,
but most people find that whatever the shape,
their own head comes in handy
a lot of the time.
That's why they wear helmets.
Some people even wear helmets
when they don't really need to.
I guess they're worried about birds,
or maybe they just don't like
the shape of their own head.
Maybe that's why they wear hats, too.
Whatever the reason,
it's obvious that heads are a lot like rock and roll,
they're here to stay!


This one makes me think of poor Pericles and his helmet. Nice one indeed, I suspect the right crowd will eat it up...not that my suspiscions about crowds are really authoritative...or even based on any empirical evidence, now that I think about it. Ummm. Yeah.
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